The Lies We Lead
by cratzey31
Summary: Inuyasha never stood a chance. But if he had known she would be lying here dead in his arms, he would have fought it harder. He would have denied himself love, if he had known it would have kept her alive.Please R&R!
1. Chapter 1

**A/N- **I don't own any of the characters in this story, unfortunately. Weeeelll, except Makoto. he is pure mine.  
>I am going to try and keep everyone as in character as possible, but please to remember that this is my first fanfic, so I may not do as well as hoped. and the pairings for this are InuKag, Mir/San, Inu/Kik and beyond that I am not sure. I am kinda writing this as I go so...yeah. Please, please, please review! Even if you think it is horrible, any reviews would be nice :) thanks, and enjoy

**"Tell me now, where was my fault in loving you with my whole heart?"**- Mumford ans Sons, _White blank page._

Inuyasha had never been fond of small rooms. As a half dog demon, he always felt more at ease in open atmospheres, where there was plenty of room to stretch your legs and walk around if you were ever needed to stay in a particular place for a length of time. Like right now. Even though he was pretty sure that if he did indeed try to pace the tiny room he would collapse from physical exhaustion and lack of sleep, he still would have liked the option. Leaning forward in the uncomfortable metal chair he was seated on, Inuyasha propped his elbows up on the equally uncomfortable wooden table and placed his head in his hands. His throat was parched, and it felt liked he hadn't spoken in days. Maybe he hadn't. When WAS the last time he had uttered a sound? How long had he been in here, anyways? _Keh. Not like it matters. It's not as if I have anywhere to be_, he thought, and with a defeated sigh sat back in his chair once again. He looked down at his hands, and almost stopped breathing. Again. Her blood was still caked in a thick coating on the palms of his hands and dried underneath his long claws. The scent that was emanating from them… No. He shook his head to clear his mind a bit, and took a deep ragged breath. _I won't think of that_, he thought._ I won't. I can't. I…_ he closed his amber eyes for a second, two seconds, three seconds, and when he opened them, his golden orbs were unfocused and staring into a distant past and he was already gone.

Detective Makoto watched through the two-way mirror at the hanyou in the interrogation room. He watched as he fidgeted and sighed, and then as he seemed to be struck by his circumstances again. The way he seemed to completely dissolve at one glance at his hand made the detectives heart break a little bit. Even though the only bit of evidence that they had at the moment ( mostly being the said man in the room) pointed to Inuyasha being the murder, Makoto had a hard time believing it. Maybe it was the way he looked so…defeated, sitting there in a pair of snug fitting blue jeans that seemed to be more torn to shreds than sewn together at this point, and a blood and dirt stained white shirt with three long slashes through the front. Or maybe it was the fact that the only time he had seen the suspect show any emotion was when he looked at his bloodstained hands. He wasn't sure, but he felt as if there was more to this than the initial theory that was being passed around the department right now. He had been in here for almost 48 hours now, and the hanyou hadn't once spoken or cooperated with a single person. The first two cops who had tried to interrogate him and received nothing but blank, sometimes slightly annoyed stares and maybe the occasional twitch. By the time the third agent went in there, the hanyou merely stared at the wooden table in front of him and seemed unaware of his presence. He never once lifted his eyes from the table, and it seemed to Makoto who was standing on the other side of the two-way mirror, he didn't seem to move a muscle once. Taking his hands out of his pockets, the detective stood and stretched his cramped legs briefly before opening the door perpendicular to the mirror. Letting the door swing shut behind him, he took a sharp right and found himself standing in front of the door to the interrogation room. Taking a steadying breath, he opened the door, and walked in. He wasn't particularly sure what he was expecting to happen, but he knew he needed to speak with this man. Even if he didn't respond. At least for Kagome's sake.

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><p>I know it was short, but I figured it was a good place to leave off :) Please Review!<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

In the back of his mind, Inuyasha registered the door to his interrogation room opening with a soft _swoosh_, but he couldn't bring himself to care enough to acknowledge whoever had entered. He heard the slight squeak of leather loafers walking towards his table, and the sound of a chair being pulled back, then scooted in, and yet again decided that the person who came to speak with him wasn't worth the effort of opening his eyes. They would just ask the same questions over and over and over again. But then a very familiar smell began wafting towards him, and he couldn't help the treasonous twitch his nose gave. Very slowly, he cracked his right open just enough to get a fuzzy view of the man seated in front of him, holding a very delicious looking bowl of beef ramen in his hands. _Damn him. How did he know? _Trying to act nonchalant, Inuyasha opened both eyes lazily, and leaned back so he was balancing on just two chair legs, and stretched his arms as far over his head as he could. Fuck, it felt good to move. He leaned back down onto all four legs, and crossed his arms over his chest and just stared blankly at the man in front of him. For some reason, the feeling that he had met this officer before nagged at him. He racked his brain quickly, trying to place why he seemed so familiar, but nothing came to him besides that initial spark if recognition. He tried his hardest to look stern while displaying his blank look, but that was soon countered by the deep rumbling noise that emanated from his stomach. God. Dammit. First his nose betrayed him, and now his stomach. Was there no body part that was still loyal to him? The detective gave a small chuckle and set the steaming bowl down in front of Inuyasha.

" Here. You must be starving. Do you know how long you've been here for?"

As the detective leaned forward to place the food near enough for Inuyasha to take if he wished, he caught the glint of the badge and read the name on it. Detective Makoto. _I know that name.. but where do I know it from? Come on, come on... where...? Shit. Son of a mother fucking-_

" _Y_ou're a cop?" His voice came out scratchy and hoarse, but still had the deep undertone it normally carried. Man, his throat was burning. How long had it been since he had spoken ? Surely only a day or two. Maybe three. Clearing his throat, he pushed the pain aside and studied the cop closely. Yeah, this was him. He looked exactly the same as he had in the photo, except maybe a little older, with more salt than pepper in his hair now. There were more than just laugh lines creasing his face, and his weight seemed to almost dangerously low, but Inuyasha couldn't blame him for that. If he was in his position, he wouldn't have been eating, either. His eyes still had that same steadiness, that underlying gentleness that was there from the few times he had glimpsed his face before. Now, he saw that same gentleness aimed at him right now, and for the life of him, Inuyasha couldn't figure out why. Hell, he had half a mind to go a kneel in front of the guy and offer his throat to rip out, and even that was a more than he deserved. Dying a slow, torturous death by fire and mutilation was almost too good for him, and he couldn't understand how this man was not looking at him with pure rage. His bewilderment must have shown on his face while he was studying him, because Makoto suddenly stood up, turned around and marhced out the door. Watching him retreat, Inuyasha couldn't help but feel another stab or regret._ Another good person whose life I fucked up. When will it end? Wa_sn't losing Kagome enough? No. it would never be enough, so long as he was breathing. Nothing would ever make up for the damage he had caused, and the pain he had inflicted on anyone who had ever had the joy of knowing her. Which was pretty much the whole goddamn world. He sighed, and absently stirred the bowl of ramen that was still sitting in front of him. His appetite was gone, and in it's place a hate and rage tore at his insides. What was he doing here? If he lied, and said he did it, they would lock him up forever, maybe even give him the death sentence. Good. He didn't want to live anymore, not knowing what it was like to have a life like what he lead just a month ago. But it would take too long, and the trial would do nothing but show him things he would rather leave buried. No, his best bet would be to escape, and end it himself. Find a nice bus to jump in front of, or a piece of rope to dangle from. He stood, and started pacing again, getting more and more agitated as he started to think of ways

to get out of this hell hole. If only he had taken the offer to do the remodels of the station, he would have a blue print already etched in his brain. He was probably going to need outside help on this one. _I wonder if they will still let have my one phone call? I could probably convince Miroku to break into the archives at the office, but how would he get that info to me? I suppose he could- _Inuyasha was jerked from his thoughts as the door opened again and Makoto entered again, carrying two pitchers of water and two glasses balanced on a ratty silver tray. He walked to the table and set down the pitchers and glasses, then walked back to the door to set the tray right outside, and then he pulled the door closed. Makoto walked back to the table and sat down in the same chair he had seated himself in before. Scooting up to the table, he looked at Inuyasha, who had frozen in the middle of his pacing to just stare at him with his mouth slightly agape, and raised an eyebrow, shocking Inuyasha more. He couldn't move, couldn't stop staring at the man sitting down.

"Care to join me?" Picking up one the glasses, Makoto grimaced. " Sorry I wasn't able to get us actual glasses, but apparently suspects aren't allowed to have anything that could be used as a weapon. Including glass. I got the ones with the least amount of stains on them though, so at least that's something."Glancing at them, Inuyasha noticed they were indeed plastic, and not very appealing to look at either. In fact, they looked as if they were made with the intent to be drive the recipient _ away _from , Inuyasha slowly moved towards the table, and sat down again, his amber eyes never leaving the cops'. They were chocolate brown, not nearly as pretty as Kagome's had been, but definitely not the flat color that most Japanese had.

" I saw you were thirsty. Have a glass, it will make you feel better, I promise. I know you demons have different needs than us humans, but I figure you need water the same as all the rest of us." Smiling slightly, he poured water into both the glasses, and set one down in front on inuyasha while taking a sip from his before he set it down again. He waited until the hanyou had picked up his glass and started to drink before he spoke again." To answer your question, no, I'm not a cop. I'm a detective." Inuyasha snorted into his glass, spraying water onto his face in a very not-so-graceful way. " Seriously, old man? Same fucking difference."

"So, you're a construction worker?"

"Fuck no. I'm a architect. And before you try to pull the whole it's-the same-thing bullshit. I plan, create, and mold beautiful dreams into reality. Detective is just a fancier way of saying cop."

"Hardly. But I won't argue with you on this. Eat, you must be hungry." Inuyasha felt like debating more, but the temptation of food was just too great. The ramen had gone cold by now, but he still shoveled it into his mouth with the pathetic spork he had been given as fast as he could. When he was done, he leaned back and laced his fingers together behind his head, and began to study the detective once again.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome."

They sat together in silence then, Detective Makoto staring at the wall with a contemplative look on his face, and inuyasha staring at the detective, trying to get his emotions under control. He wanted to ask some many questions of this man, but knew it wasn't his place. The only reason he had been as responsive as he had been with him was because of his connection to Kagome, and he couldn't help but feel as if the an knew that. He was nervous, waiting for the bomb to drop, for the murder to ensue, but nothing happened. Inuyasha was puzzled, and intrigue by him, and he was thankful that he was taking him away from the dark brooding bubble he had been wrapped in, even if it was for just a minute. He sat perfectly still with his hands still behind his head, and waited patiently for the detective to get on with it. Finally, Makoto tore his eyes away from the spot on the wall that they had been previously fixed to, and focused back onto Inuyasha. Taking a deep breath, Makoto said, " I know you didn't do it. So why aren't you cooperating?"

Inuyasha merely kept staring, giving away no apparent intention to answer his question. Just as Mokoto opened his mouth to ask the question again, Inuyasha interrupted with, "Why are you being nice to me? I know who you are. Kagome used to talk about you all the time. She fucking idolized you after her dad died. So, why are you, her godfather, being nice to me, her murderer?"

"Because I know you didn't do it," Makoto repeated.

"How can you fucking say that? I'm sitting here, with her blood all over me, dried onto my skin, and was found holding her dead body. How could you possibly believe that.?" Inuyasha growled out his question, and felt himself start to lose some of the self-control he had been keeping in check since he had been taken into custody.

" Did you do it?"

Silence met the detectives last question. The young man had anger written all over his face, but his jaws were clenched shut, and his eyes held steel determination in them.

" Will you tell me what happened?"

Silence again.

"Ok. Fine. I really didn't expect anything less from you. Kagome used to talk about you all the time. No, she didn't outright gush, obviously, because how good would that look, for her to be in love with a married man? No, she just had this way of finding a way to slip you into every conversation we had. It was like every part of her life was tied to you, and it worried me. Who were you, to hold her heart so tightly, but give her nothing in return? She deserved better than a life hidden behind the woman you laid in bed with every night. I used to hate, and I think a part of me still does, because whatever happened to her, it had something to do with you. But the way you looked...when we found you... there's no way a man who didn't give her every part of himself would have been in the state you were. You are in. I realize you don't want to tell me, but I have a job to do, and that is find out what happened to my goddaughter. For Kagome's sake, I'm going to give you an option that I normally don't give to suspects." Here he paused, and keeping contact with very attentive hanyou, took something out of his pocket, unfolded it, and laid it on the table between them. He reached into his other pocket and pulled out a pencil and laid it down as well. Inuyasha glanced down between them to see several pieces of blank paper lying next to the pencil. Confused, he looked back up at Makoto, starting to ask him what he meant, but fell silenced when Makoto raised his right hand in a _stop _gesture.

" Talking about it... I couldn't even imagine it. It would rip me right apart if I was in your shoes. Write it down, Inuyasha. Tell me everything, but you won't have to utter a sound. Just... give me closure. Something, anything." Makoto's voice cracked at the end, leaving him with lost look on his face. He took a deep, ragged breath, and looked like he was going to say something else, but decided against it. He shook his head sadly, not really certain why he was doing it, and turned to start walking out. He got halfway to the door when he heard him ask soflty,

" Where do I begin? It goes back farther than you know."

Not turning around, Makoto responded with, " The beginning. Which beginning is something you'll have to figure out." With that he continued out the room, the door thudding closed behind him.

Inuyasha just sat there. He wasn't sure if he was breathing, even, as still as he felt. It might have been minutes, or hours, or days. Then suddenly, he leaned forward and began writing. And writing and writing. If Makoto wanted everything, that's what he would give.


	3. Where to go from here

_**Bury it**_

_**I won't let you bury it**_

_**I won't let you smother it**_

_**I won't let you murder it**_

_**Our time is Running out**_

_**Our time is running out**_

_**you can't push it underground**_

_**You can't stop it screaming out**_

_**Muse, Time is Running Out**_

_All of my life, everyone has known who I was. The hair and eyes were normally a dead giveaway, but even when I attempted to hide by dying my hair a deep black and putting in brown contacts, someone always recognized my face. Being the son of the man who owned 90 percent of Western Industries, and 95 percent of the Eastern ones, made flying under the radar next to impossible. Not that I'm complaining, mind you. Well, alright, I'm mostly not complaining. I'm not going to lie, I have never been a man a patience. Not. Ever. So when people are bugging me for interviews, or asking my opinion on this or that, I try to book it out of there as fast as I can. For the sake of the poor persons life,of course. Throwing punches is not beneath my anger. Nor is murder of paparazzi, because honestly, they don't count as people. Wait, don't take that to mean I condone murder, because I don't. Except the paparazzi. And Sesshomaru. And Naraku. And that pizza delivery guy who I found out was telling me that my pizzas cost more than they really did so he could keep the overage as a tip. Fucker. But, anyways, you get the point. Actually, just disregard that entire first paragraph since I just realized that writing my statement about who I condone being murdered (or any murder at all) in an interrogation room where I am, in fact, being detained for the possible murder of my mistress (who isn't really my mistress, by the way, that just seemed like the best way to describe our situation to an outside observer. If anyone reading this, even THINKS of thinking of Kagome as a whore of any sort, or as a mistress, or with any sort of sexual thoughts, I will murder you. Wait, no, I will "talk" with you personally) isn't exactly the best time to be discussing murder. I would erase it, but it seems that my pencil has no eraser, just some markings that look eerily similar to human bite marks where they it should be._

_ANYWAYS._

_Like I was saying, everyone has always known my face. Known what I wore wear, who I dated, every breath I took, it seemed like it was documented by someone. Even you, detective, probably know more about me than you do of the guy who lives next door. That kind of life wears down on a person early on in life, and it would have been that way for me, if it hadn't been for the part of my life that no one knew about. My parents had a feeling, but I don't think even they knew everything that happened when they weren't looking. And to understand how ended up with so much blood on my hands and yet still claim to be innocent, you have to know the details. Makoto, I have never told anyone about this, ever. The only people I wanted to tell were already aware and very much involved in it, so there was never any reason to, you know?So forgive me for the way I have to tell you. You see, towards the end, Kagome and I both were both under the firm belief that something like this would happen, and one or both us wouldn't make it. So we made...records, I guess you could say, and combined them so that whoever saw them would have the whole story from beginning to end, from both our viewpoints. Like a story, except when you read it, you will be able to hear, and smell and feel everything we felt. I know this isn't making much sense Makoto, but please, just bear with me. It will. I also told myself I would write this all down, but I think any words I wrote would just fall short. So _

_I will show you instead._

_ You have read in the papers about what our company was researching right? Well, if you haven't, I will fill you in. We have a whole department designed to strictly be studying advanced technologies. Weaponology, scientific discoveries, electronic advances, you name it, and we have been developing it. Which is where the ..records... come in. We have been able to find a way to turn memories into something like a moving picture I guess you could say. I can't explain it that well, I only know how to use the machine we have created to hold the memory movies, but Sess will. Show him this paper, and he will take you to the people who can explain it a whole helluva lot better than me. Hopefully, my brother went ahead and revealed to the public the research about it like he was scheduled to do on Monday. I have no idea what day it is, so if not, please don't show this paper to anyone yet. I know you might be legally bound to record this, but if possible, please just wait until it has been launched before you give this to evidence. Please. My brother would make it a point to kill me if this was leaked, and I don't mean that in joking terms. He would SLAUGHTER me. Anyways, before you take this to Sess, go into my bedroom at my house (I am assuming you still have it under crime scene investigation , or whatever shit you do. ) There will be a picture frame with a picture of Kagome, Miroku, Sango, Shippou, Kouga and I at a beach house on top right shelf in my closet. Take the picture out of the frame and on the back there should be a code written on it. Take this with you when you go see my brother, and he can take you to the memory movie I have hidden. I know I could have told you all this in person, but I don't know whose listening. So please, follow the instructions, and I don't want to talk to anyone except for you anymore(or, more accurately, I won't) and I don't want to talk to you until you know everything (or more accurately, I won't. Again.) Just leave me be. And if you do end up going through with what I've told you to do, thanks. Really. Kagome... she would have been happy that you knew. She hated not telling you anything. So again, thanks._

Placing his pencil on the table, Inuyasha looked towards the two-way mirror where he knew someone was standing watch over him.

"Oi. Tell Makoto I'm done, and he can come get his goddamn paper now."

Standing up, he stretched again, feeling his muscles rippling protest after having sat in the position for so long again. He grabbed his chair and dragged it to the farthest corner away from the table and propped it against the wall. He then plopped on the ground, and with his back to the door, managed to wriggle around a bit before he was in a comfortable lying position on the ground. He heard the door open again, but he pretended to be asleep, not acknowledging whoever had come in.

"Inuyasha," Makoto called softly. For some reason, Makoto knew he wouldn't respond. He hadn't know the boy for more than a few days, and had only had one face to face conversation with him, but he knew him well enough already to know that if he didn't want to do something, he wouldn't. Not unless something or someone he cared for was being used against him. Inuyasha may think he was hard to figure out, but after listening to Kagome talk about him for so long, he could read the boy like an open book. He smiled softly, and gazed at the "sleeping" form in the corner. Not seeing the hanyou move, he went and gathered the things from the table, making sure that no water or ramen accidentally leaked onto the pages he had picked up. He tucked the pencil behind his ear, and with one last look at the still form i, he sighed softly and left, leaving the man alone again, with only his thoughts for comfort.

I know, so short! But I am already working on the next chapter, and I figured since it had been a while, I would at least give y'all a little something, even if it doesn't explain much more than what you already know. The next chapter will be better I swear!

Thank you all for the reviews again 3


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